Some how she knew that you didn't get many moments like this in your life: moments when you knew, without any doubt, that you were alive, when you felt the air in your lungs and the wet grass beneath your feet and the cotton on your skin; moments when you were completely in the present, when neither past nor the future mattered. She tried to slow her breathing, hoping somehow to make this moment last forever.
This guy fell out of his nest a little early, but thanks to TWRC he will be fine. It was a remarkable experience to get to be near this bird, still covered in baby fluff, but two feet tall and with talons that could rip the flesh from my forearm, he was beautiful. I have more photos that I haven't gone through yet, but I had to get at least one up tonight.
Spent the past weekend at Enchanted Rock State Natural Area with the SHSU Outdoor Rec group. I have so much fun on these trips. This one included sunrise yoga on top of a batholith, rock climbing, bouldering, hiking, and caving. If you want to, check out my trip photos here.
I snapped a couple of photos then I gave a little whistle. My roadrunner friend's feathers stood straight up on his head. His expression of "ZOMG" gave me the giggles and he ran away but not before I caught him in his moment of surprise.
Spent the day in the garden today, pulling out thorny vines and weeds until my hands are sore and my arms are scored with tiny pink line where the brambles raked across my skin. I planted several different kinds of basil, two cherry tomatoes, some peppermint, lemon balm, bee balm, and lantana.
I rearranged my outdoor furniture so that it sits in a little grouping on the side porch, under the shade of the balcony, looking out at the side garden.
The perfect place for a cup of tea.
I also found this chrysalis in the dirt of one of my beds. It is still alive, when you squeeze it lightly it wiggles. I thought I might of knocked it off something when I was terrorizing the weeds. I took it over to Gina's house thinking she would be able to find a way to attach it to something to let it hatch. She knew what it was and said that it was a big moth and the chrysalis belonged in the dirt. So I took it home and reburied it in the garden.
I got my new socks from Sock Dreams in the mail today. I put them on and I think they immediately made me happier. I did a little happy dance in front of the bathroom mirror, put on my hiking boots and headed out for a walk. I even figured out the self timer on the D300 just so I could snap this happy shot and share my happy socks with the happy world. Steve thinks they have laced my socks with drugs. If they did, they are happy drugs.
I love just hanging out in my woods, watching the pups snuffle through the underbrush. There was one morning where I was listening particularly hard and wishing I could collect sounds like I collect pictures. I thought that I would concentrate on the sounds and write them all down as I moved through this day in my life. There were all the different bird calls, the dry shuffle of leaves underfoot, pugs snorts, bugs zipping through the air, woodpecker's report on dead pines. Then I headed for work and I realized that the closer I got to town the more I NEEDED to tune out, listening and focusing on sounds was giving me a headache. Diesel engines, radio commercials, air conditioners humming, horns, people chatting away on their cell phones, presses running, printers churning, the whirl of fans cooling hard drives. It made me wonder, how much are we unconsciously effected by this everyday? Would my brain be less tired if I didn't have to tune all this out, if I could hear the wind move the trees all day instead?
Anniversaries :: Steve and I celebrated seven years yesterday. It was nice, we gave each other food. He picked me up one of my favorites, the veggie chef salad from Cafe Express and a new book, Willful Creatures by Aimee Bender. I got him a sausage and pepperoni Papa John's pizza and a chance to win several million dollars. We sat around and ate our dinners and watched the first part of the HBO John Adams series and watched it rain. There was a bunny in the yard sitting under a bush waiting out the rain. I watched it saunter off when it slowed to a drizzle, stopping to munch on weeds. I sent it a little bunny-mind-speak message, "Go eat the weeds in the garden." Believe it or not, I got a message back, "I will visit your garden as soon as you plant your veggies." We got these lovely begonias from Steve's mom, we got a dinner date from Gina, and we got a night at a local winery bed and breakfast from my parents. It will be a super relaxing and yummy escape. I can't wait!
Assholes :: In other news, I had a crap day at work. I hate getting mad, because when I get mad, I cry. Then all I can think is "don't cry" and not what I want to be thinking which is some bitingly witty remark that proves that this person is being a complete and total asshole who isn't pleased no matter how hard anyone tries to do anything which is probably why we feel like doing nothing, because if you get shit on for doing nothing at least you didn't put any effort into it. The miserable part is that I was really happy with what I had done. I guess I should use this as motivation to work on my own stuff, to find a way to move on.
Finding myself shooting into the sunshine a lot lately. Hopefully I will get over it before I go blind. I have been listening to podcasts like crazy. New season of RadioLab just started, This American Life, an old favorite, picked up The Moth and TWIP (This Week in Photography) this week. I love podcasts.
I'm a new soul I came to this strange world hoping I could learn a bit about how to give and take. But since I came here, felt the joy and the fear, finding myself making every possible mistake.
What a Sunday morning looks like: Steve sleeps late, me and the dogs sneak out so we don't wake him, morning walk, over at Mom and Dad's, spilled coffee, crumpled papers, treats for puppies, then we all settle down and sip our second cups of coffee and read the Item and the Chronicle while dogs snooze on laps or extra pieces of couch.
Primary Day. A line of Democrats with a couple of GOP invaders, voting for Hillary.
Caucus. It was a little crazy, but everyone worked together. Obama got 10 of 16 delegates in Riverside, Texas. Next stop, County Caucus.
Didn't do too well with the whole "February Goals" things, but it was a short month, and I was sick for like a week and a half, and I went caving, and there was the geology weekend, and the weekend where the weather was way too nice to be productive, and there, my month is gone. I think I'm going to keep it simple in March.
Today I found an envelope at the museum park that asked me to open it. Being a curious person, I did. Inside was a letter and fifty-four dollars. The person was using this monetary sacrifice to parallel Jesus' sacrifice and convince the person who found it (me I guess?) that they too should become Christian. It seems a little presumptuous to me to ask someone to renounce their philosophy or system of belief for fifty-four dollars. Oh well, the Lion's Club is fifty dollars richer and I have money for lunch on Friday. ROAR!
Steve had extra credit assignments for geology this weekend. We went on a geology walk, which was more of an environmental science talk. Then we went to the rock and mineral show in Pasadena. I got a 300 million year old sea bug fossil (trilobite). I love fossils, super cool.
Slow down, you move too fast. You got to make the morning last... Life, I love you, All is groovy.
Last week was a neglected week. I planned. I intended. I thought about. I tried. But in the end I mostly just slept. It wasn't a bad week it just took too much effort.
Last weekend I went caving at Colorado Bend State Park. I went with the Outdoor Rec group at the University where I work. The best part wasn't the caving, or the camping, it was just the people. It's been so long since I have enjoyed just being with people so much. I get so used to it being an oddball thing for me to want to do something like caving, or eat something like hummus (both of which I was ridiculed for this week), that it was just nice for it to be the norm to want to crawl on your belly through a muddy hole, and to eat with people who think hummus is a staple. Just the general relaxed, non-competitive, non-judgmental attitude of the entire group was such a pleasant shift. I will definitely go again, if they will have me. Oh yeah, caving was awesome too.
Today I went to the library. Sometimes I think I like acquiring books more than I like reading them.
I didn't sleep well last night. I woke up to Sony having a puggish asthma attack. Once he calmed down I tried to go back to sleep, but my inner-critic was up too and decided 2am was the appropriate time to gnaw at the inside on my skull. He wanted me to know that I needed to change my oil and that I shouldn't wear the same pair of jeans three times a week and that I hadn't started to accomplish any of the goals that I set for myself which is OK since they weren't worth a crap anyway. After about 45 minutes of that I got up took a shower, and then went back to bed. I woke up groggy and crappy and late. I would have called in sick, but I had responsibilities at work, people waiting for me to finish their projects. Things due. I called in late. Sometimes when I do this I steal a little moment for myself. I got dressed, brushed my hair, ate my breakfast, had my tea, and then, instead of bustling off to the office, I looked into three little puppy faces and asked, "Do you wanna go for a walk in the woods?" Heads tilt. Ears perk up. There is a mad dash to the front gate, and we are off. A moment in the day where I transfered my time from looming deadlines and a sunless building to a sunlit walk down a little wooded path with three friends who run through the trees for the sheer joy of a new smell.
One month down in twothousandeight already! I feel like I'm going to have to step it up if I want to accomplish anything this year. Here are my goals for February.
